I like count-downs. The second of five home screens on my cellphone is full of countdowns to any number of things: our first anniversary, my husband’s birthday, the day we get to take Graham home. They are happy things, events I look forward to celebrating.
Logan found out that he will be leaving WA to join the USS John C Stennis on deployment very soon. They will be flying him overseas to who knows where, and then will be flying him to the boat. It is so weird to me, that for the first time since we met, I won’t have the slightest clue where he is on this planet. I know he will be on an aircraft carrier, in some ocean or sea on a planet that is over 70% water. Real specific there. Won’t know how to contact him at first and won’t know when he’s coming home.
I don’t know how I feel about him leaving just yet…overwhelmed I guess. We have known since South Carolina that he might have to join the end of the deployment, but there was always some small amount of hope that he wouldn’t; many reasons why it would make sense for him to stay, not that those matter now. I’m going to have to do what we’ve been saying, either sign for a house on my own using a power of attorney or figure out what to do if the deal falls through. Feels like an enormous amount of responsibility.
I heard the news a few hours ago now and I still mildly feel like I was punched in the gut. It’s a hard pill to swallow, and a few other of those cliches. Definitely not counting down to the 25th..