I have been pregnant for four seasons, but it feels as if I have been pregnant for a whole year.
Spring of this year, I had just found out, and was terrified of losing the baby. Summer came and went in an overheated blur. Early Fall was probably the best time for me during this pregnancy. Too much time left to worry about the future, and the last few weeks before getting really big and uncomfortable.
Every morning I wake up now, terrified that I’m going to find a new, red and very angry looking stretch mark on my belly. I had NO new ones – aside from those I got from being severely overweight in high school – until last week. Now the old silver lines on my hips have a flame tipped look, as they stretch up and down.. and there are brand new marks on my stomach.
And I still have a week or two or three to go.
Physically, I’m the same as I’ve been for about a month now. The antibiotics I got from the ER for the bronchitis I had earlier this month worked their magic. I’m not even sure if I was lucid enough during those three-ish weeks to so much as mention I had gotten sick, let alone that the cold settled into my lungs, requiring treatment beyond benadryl and tylenol.
My sciatic nerve pain was replaced by between the shoulder blades pain, which was replaced by the pain of a “dysfunctional pelvis” (also known as pubic symphysis dysfunction), meaning the ligaments holding my pubic bone together have been trying to separate way before labor. Not exactly a good thing, but a common-enough thing which definitely makes it hard to walk some days.
I have learned the pregnancy “waddle” is definitely a limp in disguise. And while I don’t exactly feel ready to be a mom in the classic, taking care of a newborn sense, I am definitely ready to be done with this. I have my 38 week appointment today, which will no doubt be mostly pointless, beyond helping my mom remember the 15-20 minute drive to the hospital.
She’s been here a week now, and while it’s nice to have company again, I would still rather it be my husband. But I could write a whole other post about that..