Spring Cleaning

I’ve seen this post written a dozen times across the blogosphere. Something bad happens and the blogger disappears for a while and then triumphantly returns, better than ever! At least that’s how it usually goes. Sometimes it takes longer than others, sometimes the author never returns. I don’t know exactly how long I’ve been away, but things are indeed better.

I did a lot of soul searching the past week or so, while the sailor was away. I cleaned my house, cleaned out some of the junk from my life, from my heart. I forget now what I’ve said and what I’ve kept to myself, but I will share a few things that I have learned and move on.

I’ve learned I don’t like keeping the company of people who play the “let’s compare lives and see who has it worse” game. There is one person in particular who I am talking about here, and he or she will know who they are, if they ever stumbled across my blog. There is already so much negativity in life that if we all focused on it, we’d be dragged down into the murky depths of depression. I’ve decided to establish some boundaries with this person, and I feel better for it.

My husband is leaving his maybe, one week old baby at the end of December for a four month surge deployment. That doesn’t mean I’m going to mope about it. (At least not now while I still have the best of my hormones, not the other way around!) It doesn’t mean I’m going to run home to mommy and daddy. I am soo thankful for my Mom because she is going to come up and help out, but this is my baby and I am so looking forward to decorating the nursery and bringing him or her here. My place, my space. A new little happily ever after in the making. Who says I can’t have as many of those as I want?

After wishing I could be working, just to work, not because we’re hurting for the money or I’m bored of my life.. I realized, I picked the right career for me. I had been beating myself up because I wasn’t sure if being a vet tech was really the job for me.. what if I had wasted all that money and time in college for a degree that doesn’t fit me? I didn’t. It’s just that family became more important for the time being. There will be a time when I go back to work, but I can’t say right now when that will be.

So there you have it. It was time for a spring cleaning of my whole life. It may sound corny or cheesy but I honestly feel relieved and renewed. The daily headaches I was having are gone, and I think that’s because a load of bricks was taken off my chest.